Slight Detour

Well, I have been in San Francisco for 39 days and it is time to move on. Unfortunately, my trip to San Diego is going to have a little detour by way of Massachusetts. If I had a dollar for every dream I have in my head, they would all be adequately funded.

A few of the 5 people that read this blog will probably have an initial reaction of concern and condolence, but that is not necessary. Flying back to Massachusetts does not indicate failure on my part. It does not indicate the end of my adventure. I does not depress me. Who else could get a 39 day "vacation" in SF with a $1500 budget? How many people have ever even crossed the Rockies, or seen the Pacific Ocean? I have been back and forth across this country in the last few years an unbelievable number of times. I have lived in two amazing cities since graduating four months ago from college. Since college I have met easily 1000 people. Life is good.

If you are still wondering why I am going back, I'll try to explain. This whole process was full of fun, but I have also learned a lot. Finding the right type of work is not as easy as one would think. My time line was a little different than everyone else, namely that I was in a rush. I should have started the job search train a little earlier. My family would love to see me, and I would love to see them - regardless of how much I detest the cold winter. I am sure something will work out, and in the near future, I am sure that I will be doing a fair bit of traveling. I won't be tied down.

So I have two days left here in San Francisco, and I haven't quite figured out how to best spend them. However, getting up early and getting a full day in sounds like a good start.

Goodnight.

Marin Headlands - I finally found the rain.

In an attempt to maintain my sanity, and to reduce the stress that's been building up as a result of the job hunt, I went out to the Marin Headlands and the Golden Gate Recreation Area. It was the first time I have seen the fog so thick that the bridge was hidden. I did not stop at the place where we normally do, and hike down to the beach at Kirby Cove Campground. Instead, I kept driving along Conzelman Rd. all the way around and to Rodeo Lagoon and Rodeo Cove. I stopped at several places along the way, at a few different bunker sites. There was one in particular that was so quiet. It was the first time in days that I haven't had the sound of traffic, or people talking, or music, or anything related to the city as white noise. Even with the thick fog, I could hardly keep my eyes open because of how bright it was. I lay there on my back for quite a while, trying to forget everything and just think abstractly about how God is good, always - and that nothing matters but Him.

Driving along the winding road in thick fog caused me to reflect on how similar my life was to that experience. I feel like I have been winding back and forth for a while now, in a fog of uncertainty, doubts, un-answered questions, stress, etc... I spent time praying that God would grant me a spot of clarity - both figuratively and literally. You can see at the bottom what I eventually found.






I think I arrived right after it turned red.

Sausalito Rainbow

Thoughts from the Diary of a Desperate Man

I read this today on the way back from an interview in Redwood City.  It was oddly encouraging, or at least impacting.  I typed it out for others to read and to contemplate.  It comes from a book I have called Thoughts from the Diary of a Desperate Man that was given to me by family friends for graduation.  I am getting deperate ... It is applicable.

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For I am God and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, ‘my counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish my purpose.’ Isaiah 46:9... 

The Twin Pillars of Faith 

If you desire a satisfactory relationship with God, two pillars must be firmly anchored in your life.  You must believe that He is in control and that he had your best interest at heart.  

The sovereignty of God must be a deeply held conviction.  When my son was dying of leukemia, a friend wrote, “I don’t know how this tragedy came about, but I do know that it did not come from God.  God is not in the business of killing little children.”  As I pondered this observation, I concluded that if God did not kill my son, then I have a far greater problem than my son dying.  I worship a god who is not in control.  God was not sitting on the edge of the universe chagrined over the disease that ravaged my son’s life.  As I help my son in my arms while he slipped into eternity, I knew that I was experiencing the beautiful handiwork of God.

This naturally leads to the second essential pillar: The goodness of God.  God is good.  He is incapable of doing anything but good.  The debate, like so many debates in life, is overt who gets to determine what good looks like.  Do you truly believe that the huts of life come from the hand of a good God who only does what is best for you?

The writer of Hebrews, quoting from the Psalmist says, “the Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.”  There are only two people in life that can hurt you: you and God.  Because He is good, seeking only your best, in the final analysis, only you can destroy your life.  He does not delegate your destiny to Satan or any other force on earth.  

Without these pillars firmly embedded in your convictions, you will find it difficult to survive the storms of life. 

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